EP Rotary News 07-19-10

JOKES OF THE WEEK

Drunken Fools

Two men are drinking in a bar at the top of the Empire State Building. One turns to the other and says: "You know last week I discovered that if you jump from the top of this building- by the time you fall to the 10th floor, the winds around the building are so intense that they carry you around the building and back into the window." The bartender just shakes his head in disapproval while wiping the bar.

The 2nd Man says: "What are you a nut? There is no way in heck that could happen."

1st Man: "No, it's true let me prove it to you." So he gets up from the bar, jumps over the balcony, and careens to the street below. When he passes the 10th floor, the high wind whips him around the building and back into the 10th floor window and he takes the elevator back up to the bar.

The 2nd Man tells him: "You know I saw that with my own eyes, but that must have been a one time fluke."

1st Man: "No, I'll prove it again" and again he jumps and hurtles toward the street where the 10th floor wind gently carries him around the building and into the window. Once upstairs he urges his fellow drinker to try it.

2nd Man: "Well what the heck, it works, I'll try it." So he jumps over the balcony, plunges downward, passes the 11th, 10th, 9th, 8th floors and hits the sidewalk with a 'splat.'

Back upstairs the Bartender turns to the other drinker:

"You know, Superman, you're a real jerk when you're drunk."

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On the PA system: 'Cleanup on aisle 25, we have a husband down.'

Husband Down

A husband and wife are shopping in their local Wal-Mart.

The husband picks up a case of Budweiser and puts it in their cart.

'What do you think you're doing?' asks the wife.

'They're on sale, only $10 for 24 cans’ he replies.

'Put them back, we can't afford them’ demands the wife, and so they carry on shopping.

A few aisles further on along the woman picks up a $20 jar of face cream and puts it in the basket.

‘What do you think you're doing?' asks the husband.

'It’s my face cream. It makes me look beautiful,' replies the wife.

Her husband retorts: 'So does 24 cans of Budweiser and it's half the price.'

A regular meeting was held on Monday, July 19, 2010, with fourteen (14) members present: Bob White, Bonnie Davis, Cliff Dilling, Dan Wilkovich, Dave Powers, Doug Simpson, Endia Wisser, John Davis, Kerri Stewart, Mary Ann Steiner, Paula Edgar, Shirley Prater, Steve Molchan, and Vicki Hoffman.

President Kerri Stewart started the meeting.

Guests were District Governor Jim Russell, Assistant Governor Mark Flake, and Boardman Rotarian Jim Kerr.

Happy Bucks: Dave Powers was happy that his daughter has a new job which will be easier on his finances. Vicki Hoffman was happy because she saw the Rotary International President on a street corner reading the yellow pages.

President Kerri introduced District Governor Jim Russell. Jim has been a member of the Rotary Club of Newcomerstown, Ohio, since October 1997. He has served twice as Club President and has chaired Foundation, Club Service and International Service committees. He is a Multiple Paul Harris Fellow and a Paul Harris Sustaining Member. Jim served District 6650 as Assistant Governor in 2002-2004, RYLA Facilitator for 9 years, Health & Hunger Chair (2007-2009) and District Trainer (2008-2009). He participated on the most recent All Ohio PETS Steering Committee and served as member of the All Ohio PETS Training Team. Jim is a 1968 graduate of Newcomerstown High School and holds a BS in Business Management from Franklin University. He is a Vietnam Era Veteran having served in the U.S. Navy from 1969-1975. His professional life includes a twenty-four year career with Hewlett Packard Company where he held positions in Customer Service and Customer Service Sales. After leaving Hewlett Packard Jim owned ACTUP, Inc. and leaadersville.com. Both companies focused on leadership and leadership development. He is currently retired. In addition to his Rotary activities, he serves on the Board of Directors for the Newcomerstown Public Library and the Thomas R. Little Memorial Fund. Jim is married to Linda and they have two daughters, a son-in-law and two grandsons.

Governor Jim said that when he first joined the Rotary Club of Newcomerstown he went to every District meeting and every District function. He engaged in everything that Rotary was about. Rotary is a machine and driven with power, the power of Rotarians. Even small clubs can make things happen. It starts with the small club and then you get connected with the other clubs, other districts and the world. The more resources you have the more that can get accomplished.

Governor Jim asked that our Club build our membership, support the Rotary Foundation and promote leadership. He encouraged members to attend the District Leadership institute if we are interested in becoming a District Committee Member or other leader on the District level.

One of the projects during this year will be a literacy lunch box which is actually a zippered school kit bag. The Warren Club has several members who are in the import/export business who have the capability of acquiring quantities of these kits. If our Club would like to participate they would be asking for a monetary donation. Our Club may even be interested in acquiring extra kits to pass out at our local school. The kits will have the District's log imprinted on them.

Governor Jim spoke about the District Conference to be held on April 29 & 30, 2011, which will be a Family Fun Fair at the Stark County Fairgrounds filled with fun, food and fellowship. Governor Jim is going to try something different. The District Conference is held once a year and one-fifth (1/5) of the District's Budget is used to pay for this event and historically between 150 to 400 Rotarians attend. There are 2,070 Rotarians in the District and this is a huge expense for the ratio of attendance. On Friday night, April 29th the business part of the conference will be held at which time awards will be presented at the Kent State Conference Center. The cost to attend will be at whatever the cost for the meal is, no extra charges. This will last about 3 to 4 hours and Rotarians can then go home to their families. On Saturday, April 30th beginning around 10:30 o'clock AM (to allow Rotarians to spend time with their families and allow travel time) the Family Fun Fair will be held at the Stark County Fairgrounds exhibit hall. This will be a day of fun, food and fellowship with Rotarians and their families. The idea is to generate enthusiasm and involve the youth (Interact and Youth Exchange).

Governor Jim then opened up the floor for questions and discussion. Cliff Dilling then asked if more people from our Club, other than the one person who attended, (Bonnie), could attend the Rotary Leadership Institute. Jim advised that yes, more could attend they just needed a count early so they could get the facility and instructors lined up. Jim advised that this is a great opportunity for those Rotarians interested in becoming District Committee Members, District Officers and become more involved on the District level.

President Kerri then presented Governor Jim with an embroidered dark blue shirt with Rotary's logo and the Governor's name and year and also a book for him to sign which will be shelved at our local library.

The first meeting of the new Rotary year 2010-2011 was held on Monday, July 12, 2010, with fifteen (15) members present: Bob White, Bonnie Davis, Cindy Cowan, Cliff Dilling, Dave Powers, Jana Grim, John Davis, Kerri Stewart, Mary Ann Steiner, Paula Edgar, Shirley Prater, Steve Molchan, Tom Inchak, Tom Rice and Vicki Hoffman.

Outgoing President Bonnie Davis passed the gavel to incoming President Kerri Stewart.

Happy Bucks: Bonnie Davis was sad last week with her buck to be giving up the Presidency but happy this week with her buck to turn over the gavel to a capable incoming President Kerri and wished her the best. Shirley Prater was happy as her surgery is over with. Paula Edgar was happy to have a weekend with her grandchildren.

President Kerri stated that our Club could have used more volunteers on the 4th of July. President Kerri asked Bonnie Davis to report on the 4th of July. Bonnie said that 260 necklaces were sold for $650.00 at a cost of $.36 each ($93.60), profit was $556.40. We did not get into the necklaces ordered this year which were 500 in quantity but they will keep until next year. The food trailer took in $465.90 in food sales before expenses.

Bonnie Davis, in Sondra Feezle's absence, reported that at the Relay for Life $107.00 was sold in food products and Elvis merchandise.

President Kerri reported that the concession stand at the Friday Night at the Movies held on July 11, 2010 (held on Sunday due to rain on Friday) took in $66.00 in popcorn, pop, water, cotton candy and candy sales and the movie featured was Planet 51 and there were between 51 and 68 in attendance. This Friday's movie to be shown on July 16th will be Where The Wild Things Are.

President Kerri announced that 2010-2011 District Governor Jim Russell will be visiting our Club next Monday, July 19th. Assistant Governor Mark Flake will be attending as well.

President Kerri asked if there was anyone interested in being nominated for District Governor to advise her accordingly.

Bob White announced for those who did not know that President Bonnie Davis had drawn Shirley Prater's ticket for the Atlantic City drawing. Congratulations to Shirley !

President Kerri announced that the next scrapbooking day would be September 11th with the place to be announced. We discussed having it held at the Presbyterian Church basement.