If
this doesn't make you laugh just go ahead and close
your casket!!!
A pastor concluded that his church was getting into
very serious financial troubles. While checking the
church storeroom, he discovered several cartons of
new Bibles that had never been opened and
distributed.
So at his Sunday sermon, he asked for three
volunteers from the congregation who would be
willing to sell the Bibles door-to-door for $10 each
to raise the desperately needed money for the
church.
Jack, Paul and Louie all raised their hands to
volunteer for the task.
The minister knew that Jack and Paul earned their
living as salesmen and were likely capable of
selling some Bibles. But he had serious
doubts about Louie who was a local farmer, who had
always kept to himself because he was embarrassed by
his speech impediment. Poor
Louis stuttered badly. But, NOT WANTING TO
discourage Louis, the minister decided to let him
try anyway.
He sent the three of them away with the back seat of
their cars stacked with Bibles. He asked them to
meet with him and report the results of their
door-to-door selling efforts the following Sunday.
Anxious to find out how successful they were, the
minister immediately asked Jack, "Well, Jack, how
did you make out selling our Bibles last week?"
Proudly handing the reverend an envelope, Jack
replied, "Using my sales prowess, I was able to sell
20 Bibles, and here's the $200 I collected on behalf
of the church."
"Fine job, Jack!" The minister said, vigorously
shaking his hand. "You are indeed a fine salesman
and the Church is indebted to you."
Turning to Paul, "And Paul, how many Bibles did you
sell for the Church last week?"
Paul, smiling and sticking out his chest,
confidently replied, "I am a professional salesman.
I sold 28 Bibles on behalf of the church, and here's
$280 I collected."
The minister responded, "That's absolutely splendid,
Paul. You are truly a professional salesman and the
church is indebted to you"
Apprehensively, the minister turned to Louie and
said, "And Louie, did you manage to sell any Bibles
last week?" Louie silently offered the
minister a large envelope.
The minister opened it and counted the contents.
"What is this?" the minister exclaimed. "Louie,
there's $3200 in here! Are you suggesting that you
sold 320 Bibles for the church, door to door, in
just one week?"
Louie just nodded. That's impossible!" both Jack and
Paul said in unison. "We are professional salesmen,
yet you claim to have sold 10
times as many Bibles as we could."
"Yes, this does seem unlikely," the minister agreed.
"I think you'dbetter explain how you managed to
accomplish this, Louie."
Louie shrugged. "I-I-I re-re-really do-do-don't kn-kn-know
f-f-f-for sh-sh-sh-sure," he stammered.
Impatiently, Peter interrupted. "For crying out
loud, Louie, just tellus what you said to them when
they answered the door!"
"A-a-a-all I-I-I s-s-said wa-wa-was," Louis replied,
"W-w-w-w-would y-y-y-you l-l-l-l-l-like t-t-to
b-b-b-buy th-th-th-this B-b-b-b-bible F-f-for
t-t-ten b-b-b-bucks ---o-o-o-or--- wo-wo-would yo-you
j-j-j-just l-like m-m-me t-t-to st-st-stand h-h-he
re and r-r-r-r-r-read it t-to y-y-you??"
